11. CARRIER SHALL NOT BE LIABLE FOR INJURY, DEATH, ILLNESS, DAMAGE, DELAY OR OTHER LOSS TO PERSON OR PROPERTY, OR ANY OTHER CLAIM BY ANY PASSENGER CAUSED BY ACT OF GOD, WAR, TERRORISM, CIVIL COMMOTION, LABOR TROUBLE, GOVERNMENT INTERFERENCE, PERILS OF THE SEA, FIRE, THEFTS OR ANY OTHER CAUSE BEYOND CARRIER'S REASONABLE CONTROL, OR ANY ACT NOT SHOWN TO BE CAUSED BY CARRIER'S NEGLIGENCE.
Really makes you want to go on a cruise doesn't it?
Below is my Aunt Jill's repsonse. I love my family!
Jennifer:
I don't want to be the one who shatters your dreams of a beautiful wedding, but I feel like I should be the voice of reason. Please be realistic: you can't afford to have such a fancy weddin' like them two... Think about the expense of such a high falutin' event. What about yur guests? Did you even stop to think about us? You know we are on a fixed budget, we can't afford nothin' elaborate like that, and besides, we don't want to compete with such a gorgeous weddin' party. Quit being so selfish and think of someone besides yourself, please!! If you won't change your mind, please let us know as soon as possible, we need to lose some teeth, and get some extra tattoos... Jeez, do you ever think about anyone besides yourself??? Get your head out of the clouds, and stop wishin' fer the moon.
Luv,
Yer favorite auntie Jill
I am not one of these girls who dreamed of her wedding since she was a child. I mostly dreamed about what I was going to be when I grew up, where I was going to live, and the adventures I might have. So after Mark proposed and we decided to have a traditional(ish) wedding I was a little lost but I launched into the wedding planning phase full force. I was prepared to have fun planning the biggest party I have ever thrown.
Then I discovered the truth. Wedding planning is not fun. Wedding planning sucks.
There is myth being perpetrated by evil women that planning your wedding is joyous and fun. The term used for these women is "blushing brides."
Who are all these “blushing brides”? Are they pod people from Stepford?
I present to you that there is no such thing as a blushing bride. This perception of "blushing" actually comes the red face you get after being so frustrated all you really want to do is hop a plane to Vegas and have Elvis pronounce you man and wife.
These "blushing brides" who are having such a joyous time dealing with flaky vendors and paying ridiculous amounts of money for things that would be half the price if the word "wedding" wasn't attached are making me feel guilty for not enjoying this process.
Why should I be made to feel guilty by insidious places like the knot.com or brides magazine because I don't enjoy deciding which I like better for centerpieces roses or lilies?
Isn't all that matters that I like my groom? Which for the record I do.
So does my frustration with the process mean I am any less excited about marrying Mark? Of course not! The only thing that keeps me from pulling out my hair is that I get to be his wife when this is all over with. My priorty is marrying Mark, the man I love, and not planning the “perfect” wedding or being the “blushing bride.”
So I have decided that I am officially okay with the fact that I am not a “blushing bride” and I won't be made to feel guilty about it by magazines, websites, other brides, or anyone else.
I have already been asked why my blog is entitled "Do Not Call Me Jennifer."
First of all we have to hearken back to why my name is Jennifer in the first place. My parents say my name was inspired by a styx song. I recently listened to this song. Let's just say we are lucky I did not rip off my ears and run screaming from the room. It is a truly awful song. This song alone is reason enough to change your name from Jennifer to ANYTHING else.
The actual reason I began asking people not to call me Jennifer is really due to the popularity of the name. It was the number one baby name throughout most of the 1980's. I can name 5 other Jennifer's in my 7th grade class off the top of my head. It is a disturbing experience to hear your name called and have 5 other people respond. Everyone wants to be an original and so out of sheer frustration I asked people to call me Jenny. At the time there were no other Jenny's in my class so it seemed original enough. I realize it's not exactly Princess Consuela Banana Hammock but I figured it would work.
This change disturbed my Mom greatly. She hated it. She has refused to acknowledge my request to be called Jenny. My friends would call the house and ask for Jenny and she would tell them they had the wrong number and hang up on them. I suppose since I was in middle school and going through the standard "I am brilliant and my parents are retarded" phase this probably caused me to dig my heels in even further.
Lastly, I have never really felt like a Jennifer. When I think of Jennifer I think of the 80's big hair, preppy, entitled, stuck up, prissy pants, debutante image. Okay, so maybe I am a prissy pants but I wouldn't consider myself preppy or stuck up. I just feel more like a Jenny.
So that being said there are still plenty of people who call me Jennifer. In my world there are 3 categories of people:
Pre Jenny Family and Friends: They were grandfathered in and can call me Jennifer whenever they want.
Those that call me Jenny: These are close friends who refer to me as Jenny per my request. However, on occasion (mostly to annoy me) they sneak in a Jennifer.
Those that dare call me Jennifer: People who have not earned the right to call me Jennifer and if they to attempt to do so they will be punished quickly and severely.
If you are not sure which category you fall into…well, then see blog title!
Another reason I am attempting to blog again is because it's a healthy and productive way to relieve my frustrations with the world. My current method is to unleash my pent up rage on any unsuspecting waiter, customer service representative, or call center employee who dares to be short with me.
So I can't promise I will post daily, weekly, or even monthly. However, I can promise you will get some insight into how I think. So be afraid...very afraid......
